Motherhood....

Wow. I love my kids. Don't believe me, visit my other blog.

But I struggle. Taylee drives me crazy. Seriously. When did she stop listening to me? Sometimes I feel like such a bad mother because I'm always harping on her. Please don't leave me a comment disagreeing with me. I don't really believe that I am a bad mother. I just feel like it sometimes. I never imagined myself raising my voice constantly at my kids, spanking them, or even yelling at them. Taylee has gotten a taste of each lately. I knew two kids would be hard, but you never really know until you are actually living in the situation you are trying to picture. Please don't feel sorry for me. I am living the dream I always wanted. I DO love my family. We're just at a rough patch right now. Taylee never listens, whines all day, NEVER stops talking, likes to scare Porter, and takes all of Porter's toys. I know she's 3, and has a new brother, but really.....wow. God, please give me MORE patience! I don't think I'll ever get enough.

This is for all you mom's out there struggling. I realize that these feelings are normal at times in our lives (at least I hope so!). It's ok to share them and talk about them. Onward, ever onward!!!

Prayer

wI believe in prayer. I often get annoyed and frustrated that a lot of the Christian world has forgotten prayer. Prayer today consists mostly of reading written text, or saying redundant phrases. What happened to sincere, daily conversations with God?

The husband and I practice nightly prayers, conversations if you will, with our Father in Heaven. We pray together and then individually. Our companion prayer we vocalize, while our individual prayer we keep internalized. My personal prayer last night went something like this,

"Dear Father in Heaven: Thank You for this day and for all my amazing blessings. "

(Thoughts wandering: we are so lucky to able to do so many fun things lately. Like planning our camping trip with friends. How is that going to work? Should I bring the bouncy chair for Porter? I wonder if I'll need the pack-n-play? I probably won't sleep at all because I'll be worried about the kids being cold. I bet Taylee will have a ball though. She loves being with her friends and playing outside. We should probably take the bikes. Then we can get some exercise too. Oh exercise....I really want to run a half-marathon still. I need to at least start running again. Maybe I can run 5 miles next Saturday. Oh crap! I forgot I was praying.) "Please forgive me Father in Heaven. I have so much on my mind. Please help me to be a good mother. Bless me with patience and love. (I love going home to see family. I can't wait to go home next week. We are going to have an awesome time at the condos and on the lake. And the kids will love to see all their grandparents. I bet everyone will get a hoot out of Taylee)

The husband rustles the blankets as he settles down for the night, finishes his prayer, and plumps his pillow.

"Thank You for all of my blessings. Bless me to sleep good tonight. Amen."

Case in point: What DID happen to sincere and heartfelt conversations with God?? At least I got 3 good....oh now wait, 4 good sentences in that prayer. Guess I should start with myself instead of worrying about the whole freakin' world.

My Simple Viewpoints

So I've contemplated starting this blog for a long time. Some times I want to write about things I don't feel are appropriate for our 'Family Blog'. Sometimes I want to try and make you laugh, make fun of someone or something, vent, or find ways to connect with my readers more. I know you may say, "what happened to good ol' phone conversations or face to face discussions?" I was always crappy at both. Plain and simple. So this is my attempt at exposing some of my inner thoughts, hopes, feelings, and emotions. I'm curious to see what I may discover about myself and my followers. So here it is, My Simple Viewpoints.